17 Nov Baby Steps (for moms)
Before your baby came, you envisioned the bliss, euphoria and awesomeness of being a perfect mom to your perfect child.
After your baby arrived, you were plunged into the real world of exhaustion, confusion, possibly desperation and struggle to simply sleep, eat and feed your baby (and yourself). As moms, our rite of passage is the first months when we acclimate to motherhood.
With a new baby, you have a new body. You’re depleted, exhausted, joyous, oblivious, distracted, focused, unfocused — in other words, out of touch. Of course, you’re literally touching your baby all the time, and the lines between their body and yours are blurred. Biologically, you’re only able to handle the most immediate physical needs.
It’s after you’ve made some adjustments to your new life that higher-level attention opens up. And that’s not the time to redecorate, or catch up on all your correspondence, or start teaching your kid a foreign language you don’t even know. It’s time to connect to your intuitive hits. To get in touch with resonance.
First, survive early motherhood. Then, get intentional.
After you emerge from the new-baby coma, you’ll have bandwidth available to consider getting a bit more conscious in your parenting. Not a complete lifestyle overhaul, but baby steps towards the perfect fit of parenting for you.
I want to share something I do to help me stay connected to my inner truths even while being exposed and educated to the landslide of parenting opinions that are coming my way. I use this trick keep from getting buried, and it has to do with resonance.
One of my core beliefs is that every human being can sense resonance, can tune in to what reverberates for them. Like a well-tuned violin, our bodies and minds have a sweet spot that can be our guidepost.
Here’s an example: think about the last meal you ordered in a restaurant. You read the choices and you ordered “Caesar salad with chicken” because you knew what you wanted. And you probably ordered it even after hearing the daily special of meatloaf and that your son wanted a hamburger. It wasn’t a complicated choice, but it did require you to check in with yourself.
When coming across fresh advice, whether it comes from your favorite parenting blog, your girlfriends, your mother, your pediatrician, or the magazine you glance at while you’re buying groceries, how do you know what is right for your family?
How will you stay in touch with your intuition?
Here’s ONE high-value activity that is both possible and doable for YOU:
Use the word “resonance.”
Ask, does this resonate with me?
Does it have a negative resonance, making me feel bad in some way? Is the promise offered something that soothes my soul and makes me feel cared for? Or do I cringe when I hear the solution, but talk myself into doing it because it is all the rage in my playgroup?
Resonance holds bodily intuition in it, whereas decisions rely only on the educated mind.
I want you to include your body in your parenting decisions. Holistic includes body and mind. Discernment comes from within, not from 20 comparative conversations about whether or not to feed your child meat. When considering something, ask yourself, does my body feel accepting, neutral or rejecting about this?
Tuning in to your resonance helps you teach your child to do the same. Pay attention to when your child flinches or spits out food; these are bodily responses that have meaning, not rejections of you and your thinking. Retraining a child to become numb to their intuition is not the best way to honor their abilities, yet taking advice from others without understanding how it resonates with you is the same thing.
If you can remember one thing as you emerge from your haze of babydom, simply think of resonance in your body as a “sniff test.” Does it smell all right? Does it work for you? When you get a “yes,” trust it.
Trusting your intuition makes you the perfect tuning fork for your family.
To continue taking baby steps with me, make sure to sign up for my eBook “How To Avoid The 3 Biggest Mistakes When Your Child Is Sick.” It’s a quick, 5-minute read and is so applicable now that flu and cold season is upon us!
Want to know my story? Check out the About section to learn more about the education and life experiences that inspired me to start a health revolution.